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This,
"The v.a. man, Can He Change"
is
my latest book. It is hot off the press.
To
order it or any of my books start by clicking here!
p.s.
It's about men changing because I have never seen a woman, who is
really abusive
to
her mate, change.
—Patricia
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| Take a glimpse
of this book, and we think you won't want to put it down. At last
we have tools for change! |
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VERBAL ABUSE ENDANGERS PEOPLE:
- Verbal abuse creates a pretend world
- Verbal abuse ostracizes its victims and isolates them
- Verbal abuse denigrates and diminishes human beings
- Verbal abuse invades a person's inner world and self-definition
- Verbal abuse is kept hidden and seldom discussed
- Verbal abuse may seem normal to some
- Verbal abuse coerces people to protect perpetrators
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Without men willing to change we would
have no change in the world. Men can find out what to do if they
have the v.a. problem.
The verbally abusive man
often has an 'inside' self and an 'outside' self. He shows one self
to the world. This is the persona or image, that he made up from
the outside in. It is his outside self.
His 'inside' self is the
one that appears when the world is shut out. Then it is just him
and him in you, so to speak. As if there is only one mind, his,
in the room and so of course he knows what you are, what you are
'trying to do' and even how sensitive you are.
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To
find out what is really going on with the abuser, read "Controlling
People."
BOOK
REVIEW
“...I consider your genuine blockbuster,
"Controlling People," to be probably the single greatest
Grande Synthesis I have yet seen. And I have seen hundreds of hundreds
of ambitious but partial attempts at this over my 75 years. Human
kind urgently needs this, both on an individual and a collective level.
Nothing else seems to be working very effectively. “ —Dr. David L.
Quinby Professor, Emeritus Dept. of Psychology, Youngstown
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CONTROLLING
PEOPLE: How to recognize, understand, and deal with people who try
to control you.
This
book explains the heretofore inexplicable behavior of people who
try to control people.
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Enter The Controller’s Realm And
Find Out:
- How people become controlling.
- Why controllers target only certain people.
- Why controllers drive away the people they want to be closest
to.
- Why controllers often get the opposite of what they want.
- Why most controllers appear to be nice normal people.
- What the controller fears most?
- Why controllers seem to be under the influence of a spell.
- How the “spell’s” influence can be broken.
- How someone can be a spell breaker.
- How someone could be under a controller’s influence and not
know it.
- What controllers say about themselves.
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Summary
Controlling People takes
us on a journey through a maze of senseless behaviors woven into
our world. We discover the words and incantations that produce a
controller's spellbound behavior. And, we find out how to fend off
any controller's attempts to control us.
Based on thousands of cases, CONTROLLING
PEOPLE reveals how controllers struggle to shape the lives of others.
We’ll discover the forces that compel them and why they, as if under
a spell, often destroy the relationships that they want most to
preserve. We’ll see for the first time the processes that shape
them and most important, we’ll find out what controllers are really
trying to do. We’ll know why, when they tell others who and what
they are—what they think and feel, and even their motives, controllers
don’t realize the senselessness of their own behavior. Lastly we’ll
meet some formerly spellbound controllers and find out what they
have to say about themselves.
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Readers
Praise:
"I finished reading the book . It really
brings back a lot of stuff that I endured growing up and talks
about something, that until recently, no one even believed existed,
Defining people. For years, while I was growing up, I tried explaining
exactly the same things that you describe in your book, to psychologists
and social workers, that all told me, that I was imagining things
and that I was trying to start trouble. Your latest book, is the
first, that actually describes in detail what an abuser actually
does and how they think."
—Anonymous man
"Your new book, Controlling
People, arrived several days ago and I have been burning the midnight
oil, reading every word voraciously and making notations throughout.
I greatly appreciate what you have done, Patricia, in piecing
this perplexing problem together in the way that you have. "The
Strangest Paradox" and the "True Connection" chapters really captivated
me."
—A Woman Reader
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What
people are saying about Controlling People:
"I want to tell you that I thought I
knew what control was about--that you wouldn’t have much new to
tell me--I’d read your books so many times. But, oh, you blew
my mind. Now I finally know what was wrong. Do you know what that
means to me? I can’t begin to tell you.
For years I couldn’t
understand why he’d look through me or walk away when I was talking,
or put me down and say it was just teasing. I’d have spent my
life wondering."
—From the book: "Afterword"
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THE
VERBALLY ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP
How to Recognize It and How to Respond
By Patricia Evans
The book that introduced the term "verbally abusive relationship"
to the world!
“A groundbreaking book...” Newsweek
Readers Praise
THE VERBALLY ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP
“This is the first time I have read a book about myself.
It is so clearly defined—I believe this book has saved my life.”
—J.M., Danville, New Hampshire
“I have highlighted practically the whole book...I recommended it
to my youngest daughter just an hour ago. Wish I’d been able to
read it 36 years ago!”
—M.M., Sedelia, Missouri
“No one has ever explained this tragedy as you have.”
—A.W., Denver Colorado
“Thank you for writing (this book) for me and the thousands of women
everywhere who suffer in abusive relationshp.”
—B.L., Clayton, California
“I can’t tell you how refreshing it is to finally read a book on
this subject...Reading your book has confirmed everything I have
been feeling.”
—J.M., Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
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VERBAL
ABUSE SURVIVORS SPEAK OUT
On Relationship and Recovery
By Patricia Evans
Verbal Abuse Survivors Speak Out draws upon the experience
of thousands and offers courage, wisdom, and a road map for healing
and recovery.
Verbal Abuse Survivors Speak Out tells you:
- How verbal abuse can transition to domestic violence and battering;
- How abusers control their partner's space, time and resources
- How one’s connection between the inner and outer world——between
action and result——disintegrates and how the partner may then
feel paralyzed and unable to act
- The categories of abuse women experience most
- How to cope with a person who abuses you
- How to recover the strength and confidence lost from abuse
- What to watch out for in new relationships
- How to go beyond abusive relationships
- How to recover the strength and confidence lost from abuse.
- How to look for a therapist
- How to start a support group.
- How to find help: An extensive appendix lists agencies in every
state.
Verbal
Abuse Survivors Speak Out presents a perspective on surviving
verbal abuse without blaming the survivor. This is important because
some uninformed people have claimed that the person who experiences
abuse is somehow at fault for having been in the presence of an abuser.
Thousands of readers have told me that even when they know what verbal
abuse is, after reading my first book, The
Verbally Abusive Relationship, they wonder why they still feel
paralyzed, confused, depressed and all stirred up inside long after
experiencing the abuse. These feelings are explored and answers are
found in, Verbal
Abuse Survivors Speak Out. A large section on recovery, explains
how to recover from from verbally abusive relationships--one step
at a time.
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This book is a perfect example of how the human spirit can provide
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refused to let his mother win. He had no one to help him so he learned
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This is Dave Pelzer's long-awaited sequel to A Child Called "It".
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He provides living proof that we can "stop the cycle"
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Ultimately triumphant, this book will have you living through the
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In this self-help book, Pelzer sticks with his warm and plainspoken
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WHEN
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HEALING
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by Gregory L. Jantz
In this provocative book, Gregory Jantz examines the pervasive yet
overlooked problem of emotional abuse-and why it is so common and
damaging. Whether you or a loved on has been abused by words, actions,
or even indifference, this book will help you to understand the effects
of the abuse, give you insight into the problems of the abuser, and
show you how to overcome the past. Fourth printing, 1999, Revell
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TO
BE AN ANCHOR IN THE STORM -- A Guide for Families and Friends of Abused
Women
by Susan Brewster, M.S.S.W.
A person in an abusive relationship can be desperate for a solid base
to turn to, an anchor to lend perspective and nurture self-esteem.
This book will help you assess whether or not, and how, you might
become that anchor. 2000, Seal Press, 236 pages
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SELF-ESTEEM
by Matthew McKay, PhD, and Patrick Fanning
This updated classic is still the most comprehensive guide on the
subject. It uses proven cognitive techniques for talking back to the
self-critical voice inside you. Third Edition, 2000, New Harbinger
Publications, 316 pages
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Healing
the Trauma of Domestic Violence: A Workbook for Women
(New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook)
by Edward S., Ph.D. Kubany, Mari A. McCaig, Janet R. Laconsay
"Women
who have been physically or emotionally abused by their husbands,
boyfriends, or other intimate partners often experience symptoms
of post-traumatic stress disorder
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Beyond
the Tears: A True Survivor's Story
by Lynn C. Tolson
An
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